Life is not a straight line…be JOYFUL about that!!

Despite what we are often told, success generally does not happen in neat, incremental steps on the “ladder” of life. We may believe as a young adult that if we simply work hard, follow the rules and strive to make an honest living, we will be successful in business. Similarly, with relationships, if we “play the dating game,”, follow societal standards, and are open in our feelings, we will attract and keep the perfect mate. These types of tropes or stories that we are taught either directly or through socialization seem valid and, for many, even in the face of “failure,” we assume that these stories must be true. Deviating from this story is just too frightening and confusing because it does not fit in with our belief system. I have something to say that will turn these old beliefs on end and may sound crazy at first. Stay with me though…I promise that by the end of this blog post you will find a new more joyful way to look at life and success in business, relationships, etc... These ideas are not entirely new. In fact, they go back to ancient Eastern concepts. However, they are not just some “woo-woo,” “new-age” philosophy (although they certainly are referred to in many esoteric texts.) These concepts are increasingly being validated through data and emerging fields of science and psychology. As a recent graduate with a Bachelor of Science in Sociology, I can tell you that the old “either/or”, rigid, linear view within academic disciplines is all but dead. Through data driven studies and with enough years of both qualitative and quantitative (both numbers driven, and subjective studies) research behind us, many fields of study now embrace a more integral view of life. Quantum physics sees the universe as a multi-verse which has many different expressions or dimensions and is most likely more cyclical or spiral in nature, rather than linear and heading towards an end point. Ok…have I lost you? Now that you have an idea of where the science is going, back to everyday life. How can I envision my life in a new way that will bring me more joy? That is what we all really want, isn’t it! I would suggest that once you are aware that life isn’t as simple as you were told, you can actually be more creative, more flexible, more fun, and that in turn, you will find that you are more successful, more attractive to potential (or existing) partners, and MUCH less stressed out! By seeing unlimited potential, realistically looking at your life and knowing what resources (both physical and otherwise) you have available, learning how to network, and imagining new and exciting ways to be, you are on the way to a more joyful and fulfilling future. Break away from all self-identification with those old ways of thinking. Have they really served you well? If they had, you wouldn’t need a life coach. Take on a new way of thinking. A modern, and yet ancient way of looking at the world and at your life. I can tell you from personal experience that limiting thoughts and/or unrealistic expectations are NOT the way to joy and success in life. My greatest accomplishments and my happiest moments have always occurred when I decided to reject the deep-rooted beliefs and limiting ways of thinking that were holding me back from my potential. I am not suggesting that you just recklessly quit your job and move across the country with no real plan (been there and done that,) although those kinds of actions can sometimes result in positive outcomes. I am simply saying that if you are feeling stuck; If you find yourself seeing others take action and living their truth and you say, “I wish I could do that!....,” I am here to tell you that you can! All it takes is looking honestly at resources, ways to network and being more imaginative about your possibilities in life while changing your beliefs around “the way it should be.” If that sounds like a tall order, I am the coach for you! I have many years of personal experience learning and unlearning behaviors and finally I began making a career for myself in Sociology (the study of development, structure and functioning of human society.) As a part of this, I have academically studied psychology, deviance (not a bad word,) ageing, human development, systems theory, LGBTQIA+ studies, general sociological theory, gender studies, and both qualitative and qualitative studies of the effects of such things as race, economic status, gender, religion, and sexual orientation on all aspects of life in our culture. I can help you to navigate and acknowledge these complicated issues and tell a new story…. your story of how your life can be. As your coach, I will be objective enough to not impose my own beliefs on you or tell you what to do. I will provide you with information that you can choose to accept or reject and will encourage you to honestly evaluate what is working for you and what is not. Ultimately, you are the only one that can make the decision to profoundly change the things that are not working for you. I am a facilitator and encourager. I am also honest enough to call you out on your B.S... I offer one time, weekly, monthly and specialty coaching sessions designed to fit your current needs. I also am adamant about determining for both myself and for you if we are a good fit for a coaching relationship. I offer a packet in which I introduce what to expect from me, what is expected from you, what I can offer you as a coach and a series of “ice-breaker” questionnaires so that I can get to know what you are looking to work on/towards with coaching. I look forward to delving further into how we can find more JOY for you in your career, relationships etc..